Me too. Welcome to my life.
So in an effort to keep some of my crazy off the world of social media (namely teh facebooks), I've decided to start a blog to help me work through my depression/anxiety and the world around me as those struggles affect me.
This isn't that 'Oooh everyone has a hard time every once and a while' depression/anxiety. No Sir, this is crazy legit depression-for-no-reason-anxiety-attacks-because-my-brain-hates-me-at-random-times stuff. The I'm-on-meds-to-keep-me-sane-stuff. The I-see-a-therapist-on-the-regular-because-I-don't-know-how-to-handle-it-on-my-own stuff.
And while I've made some advances in how to manage my own madness, I figured that maybe this blog will help some of you understand what goes through the head of someone like me, while offering general lulz and cat memes along the way.
I can almost guarantee there will be lots of cursing. So much that I considered making this blog 'adult only', until I realized 'fuck it...I'm too fucking lazy to give any fucks anyhow'.
See?
I can also guarantee that there will be horrible writing that may or may not be in the form of forlorn high school e-zine poetry, which I give you FULL permission to laugh at. There will be disjointed thoughts and incomplete sentences, and I will start some of my paragraphs with prepositions. I use lots of ellipses.........and 'finger' quotes. I will speak in metaphors like a bird singing on the wind, and italicize half of those sentences FOR MORE EMPHASIS. I will spell things incorectly, but probably when it involves things that live on the internet.
There will be some comedy, as long as you don't get offended easily, but there will also be some dark stuff Because, just as in life, you have to take the good with the bad.
So what I would LIKE from you is laughter, discussion, questions, and whatever else. What I NEED from you is your support when I start to head down my dark spirals.
I'm not one to waive my white flag and scream for help. I've kept my struggles to myself for just about my entire life, all while creating an exquisite mask in order to cope with the world around me. Turns out, when that mask was accidentally broken, I was more terrified of having to put my real face back out there, than I was at just super gluing the damn thing back together. So, if I disappear from here, poke me to post...or just reach out to me in general. Chances are, I'm hiding because I'm hurting, and I'm too ashamed to admit it to anyone.
Seriously. I want to help you all understand what's inside the head of someone with my types of struggles, just as much as I want you all to help me understand myself.
And with that...let's see where this ends up, shall we?
